One more day

September 29, 2011 at 11:26 pm (Uncategorized)

One more day of freedom, then kicking ass and chewing bubblegum. Here’s what I plan to do to help with the soda:

I am making kool aid using splenda, does anybody have experience with this? Will it come out okay? Anyway. For every single glass of kool-aid or can of soda I drink, I must drink 2 bottles of water. I plan on blogging at least every other night with water intake, etc. I know I can do this.

 

My lovely friend, Renee, caught me off guard last night. I was having a bad night, and I was down on myself, bad. I tweeted what I was feeling, since my new accounts are allowed to be honest, no holding back, because it doesn’t matter who reads it, if they don’t love me for who I am, they don’t need to be around with me changing. Anyway..

She replied asking ”¬†What would you say to a friend who said these things to you?”

It’s true, if you wouldn’t say it to a friend, if you wouldnt want a friend to say it, DON’T SAY IT ABOUT YOURSELF.

Period.

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October; Better Baby, Better Mommy

September 23, 2011 at 8:44 pm (Better Mommy)

October is my adjustment month. Trial and error, all that good jazz. I have a few basic goals, but as I said, it’s trial and error.

If something doesn’t work, i will fix it. That is why I have added a new category, every post related to the “better mommy, better baby” goals will be categorized as so.

Demetri Related

  • Bath every single night, by 7pm
  • 3 x meals a day
  • No naps after 4pm
  • Read to twice a day
  • In bed between 8 & 9
  • Wake up by 9am

Mommy Related

  • Take vitamins every single day.
  • Shower every single day.
  • Tweet something I love about myself daily, with the hashtag #BetterMommyBetterBaby
  • Do two crossword puzzles a day, every day, without cheating in any way. I can however ask Ruthy if I am particularly stuck.
  • Tell Ruthy I love her at least once a day.
  • Do not leave the house without make-up.
  • No more than 2 sodas a day.
  • Take pregnancy tests on 1st and 15th. Never on an off day. No matter what symptoms I am having.
  • Wake up by 8am daily.

This may be added too, or some may be fixed, or deleted completely. If I fail, I will be accountable for it. Regardless of reason.

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Good Day Turned Bad

September 20, 2011 at 1:26 am (Uncategorized)

Today was a great day. I went t0 my step moms, where we did a crafty thing I saw on Pinterest, and then hung out, and talked for hours. That part was a lot of fun, and I loved it. I love her, and I love my little brothers.

Then the bad part came. Her husband came home. I despise him. Despise isn’t even the word for it. He is disgusting, despicable, needs to take a short leap off of a tall building, kinda guy. I may sound rude, or even violent, but you don’t understand. He molested me. Continuously. For almost a year. When my step mom found out, she kicked me out. Most people wonder why I still want to be around her, it’s not a simple situation, however, I try to plan trips where I will be gone before he gets home. Tonight, it didn’t work. I was around him for over 3 hours, 3 hours of hell.

Ya see, I feel like he won.

He got my family.

I got nothing.

He gets to see my little brothers every single day.

I hardly get to see them.

He gets to live life as if nothing is wrong.

7 years later, I am still broken.

How fair is that?

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New Blog

September 17, 2011 at 2:00 am (Uncategorized)

Yes, this is a new blog, and most of you are wondering why.

 

I know I seem to restart a lot, but my life has been full of drama lately, and I’ve always felt like ‘gonnabhealthy’ was created as a weightloss blog, and it should stay that.

I need something more multi-purpose, something where I can be myself, and post about EVERYTHING.

 

Therefore, i am here.

 

For new finders, here is my introduction.

 

My name is Caitlin Carsey. Well, almost. I am getting married in 6 days. Yes 6, am I excited? Not really. I am having a small courthouse wedding, and I already count myself as married, so why get excited over a stupid piece of paper?

I am a mother. My son is 6 months old, and is the best thing that happened to me.

I am trying to conceive #2. Yes, I know, I’m crazy, but it’s what I was meant to do.

 

I am struggling with PPD, and just depression in general. I am currently on no medication because of trying to conceive, so am dealing with nothing except my son to use as a drug. If that makes sense. You see, he makes it all worth it.

I have my ups and downs, as any depression survivor does, and this blog may become a place to put those.

 

In a nutshell this blog will have:

Demetri’s milestones, my depression journey, pregnancy tests from the 1st and 15th of every month, weightloss related posts (or weightgain if I get pregnant soon), and so so much more.

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